Love at Last Sight at the Boston Moth StorySLAM’s “Doubt”

Nina Livingstone:

I am deaf and blind, need I say. And I have a cochlear implant in one ear, so I have hearing in one year, thank goodness. So going to my story, December, 1985. My friend, Joyce, called me and said to me, “I need to go to Bloomingdale’s. I’m wondering if you’ll come with me. I got to find my husband a scarf.” I said, “Sure.” Now back then in 1985, I had some hearing loss, but I also had tunnel vision. Like my sight was slowly deteriorating over the decades and years, year by year. I had something that was called tunnel vision, it was like looking through a pipe. So that if I looked straight ahead, I could only see a face, I couldn’t see anything below, on the side, et cetera. Or objects, et cetera. It was just very limited.

So anyways, I went with her. We went to Bloomingdale’s. Inside Bloomingdale’s I had my cane, I used my mobility cane, left and right. She said to me, “I need to look at this area here.” Where she was in the scarf section. So I said, “Okay, I’m going to look for gloves. I’ll be just minutes away. We’ll check in a few minutes.” So I walked away and I walked down the aisle. I swayed my cane to the left and right, trying to navigate my way around to wherever the gloves were. So as I was walking, suddenly I notice this incredible gorgeous sales woman, so gorgeous. And I have sight, she had this blonde hair cascading down below her shoulders. She had piercing blue eyes, full red lips and beautiful complexion. I was just took, I was took.

So I walked up to her and I said, “I’m looking for gloves. Can you help me?” The woman was just silent. I was really nervous. I didn’t want to stare at her you know, so I said… I started coughing and I was really trembling. I said, “I’m looking for gloves. Can you help me?” And she was just sort of … I don’t know why she was, I thought maybe she was in a trance or something. So I stepped back and I said to her, I said, “Maybe you can’t hear me. Let me sign.” I said, I’m looking for gloves. I’m spelling it out. Maybe, you can help me. I just can’t find gloves.” I’m speaking and spelling, I’m talking to her. And I’m trying to communicate, and she’s not saying anything. I’m sort of okay, I said wait a minute.

So I’m talking to the woman and I said, let me step back a minute. So I stepped back, I put my cane on the side and I said, “Can you see me? Maybe you can’t see me”. I know. I mean, I can see you. But maybe you can’t see me. So I said, that’s cool. Bloomingdale’s had somebody, a sales woman who has limited sight and hearing. I mean, that is so cool! I was like, really amazed. So I said, let me, I could sign in your hands, like tactile sign language. I said, if you want to take your hand, I’m willing to sign to you in your hand. Gloves, do you know where I could find gloves ? Okay. No response. I’m feeling just a little frustrated.

I’m not sure what to do. I’m saying to myself. Okay. So I took a deep breath. I tried one more time. I said, okay, “Can you hear me okay?” I said, “I’m going to try it one more time. I just wanted gloves, that’s all, just black gloves.” I’m going black gloves, I’m spelling it out. Okay, I’m not having success. And my friend Joyce, she was tapping on my shoulder and I said to her. “I’m trying to talk to this hot saleswoman, look.” And she’s like no. She’s tapping on my shoulder. She said, “I’m trying to tell you something.” I said, “No, no, hold on a second.” And I’m looking and my eyes start to survey and I’m looking under her chin and I see her long arms and I see her pronounced cleavage in a low cut black dress. I said this is too much. And then her hands are out like this.

And I’m thinking and looking really close. And there’s a necklace dangling from every single finger. Something’s wrong with this picture, maybe it’s me. My friend Joyce starts saying, “I got to tell you something. ” She whispered into my ears. She said, “You’re talking to a mannequin and people are looking at you.” And I said, “I want to go home. Oh my God. I don’t believe this.” And they’re looking at me talking. Oh my god. I said, “I don’t think I want to gloves anymore.” I think is there any way I could just disappear. She said, “I don’t think so.” And that was it.